I believe to have lost the last grūmus of social skills I used to have. It happened about a year ago, and yes - I did try looking for it.
A lot of things have happened in that span of time, and out of fear of not being understood, I simply mirror people; but as I open my mouth, they just keep staring at me, as if waiting for me to finish the sentence, yet I've placed the period seventy-three seconds ago...
When I was younger I used to be a great entertainer! People laughed at my jokes. Today? I've lost the art. I also talked a lot. Today? I hum and haw. Maybe in third or fourth grade I had a girl as a best friend. She was somewhat better than me, she thought; she used to initiate the game of "who can stay silent longer" on the walk home from school. She had puffy, white, smooth hands; mine were always cracked and bleeding. She was wiser, of course. Today she lives in China, and we have nothing to talk about. Maybe it's because I've lost all social skills.
And so it seems it's easier to find a book to read than someone to talk to. Yet again, as some cool cat had said: "Dialogue is like intercourse - you must first excite the other person into it, otherwise it's forced."