The kids and I did party and go to bed late all 3 days of the weekend, yet I refuse to believe that's the source of my slow grey moving about life today. It's the responsibility dragging me down. How do I make that exciting? I'm the one whispering to everyone that responsibility is freedom, so what's my beef? Maybe I can be motivated by money and food. Yet it feels like the real drive is "nothing". 

Such a Buddhist morning.

I create a bowl of matcha with an intention of sitting down and enjoying slowly, peacefully, dreamingly. And then I remember how much I loathe sitting. Sitting sittING SITTING!


You are your worst enemy, who else?

"Mom!" jolts me out of sleep
with a dozen reasons to fight against
all in my head
I heard my self-soothe:
Relax, let go, guard down
He just wanted to know I'm close


Live crossed wires sparkling at us

I came to Crestone with my heart wide open. After all, this place was a love at first sight! But slowly, over the years, I closed down to an almost unrecognisable me. A few years ago I re-evaluated this process and decided I can't live as a betrayal to myself. Small-town living always adds its own story to one's life, yet, with a bit of discernment, wisdom and new skills I can love all I want.

Open your heart here

Mercer, please find that pistachio orchard around Tularosa Basin. We're going to sit under the trees and listen to the harvest crack open. It's on my dream list. You, the kids and I. August, 3pm.